The Henson Journals

[562]

Thursday, June 15th, 1916.

682nd day

Ernest went off to Newcastle to go before a Medical Board: while I attended Mattins, and then shewed the Cuthbert relics &c to the Cecils, and walked with them in the Banks. The Archdeacon & Mrs Watkins and Cruickshank came to lunch. I walked Cecil round Houghall Wood. Newsom in khaki appeared at tea–time. He is stationed at Blyth. Ella, the Cecils, and I motored to Wynyard, & dined with old Lady L. McNeil & his wife were there, & Mrs Jamieson, Sir Douglas Haig's sister.

We returned in time for me to take Ernest to the station in order to return to his regiment by the night train. For the Medical Board sent him back to 'light duty', certifying that he would not be fit for service for three months. He was rather dejected, & went off sadly. We parted with him very regretfully, not feeling very confident that we should ever see him again. I have told him that he may come & stay here for preparation, when, after the War, he is able to apply himself to the great purpose of Ordination: but such plans are precarious enough. He may not survive: or he may only survive in a mutilated & broken form: or, worse still, his purpose may fail, and he may refuse the career: or, worst of all, his character may break down under the pressures of experience. He is in the Hands of God: and, in every effort of loyalty, will not be unhelped. I shall recall his communion on Whitsunday, and much that passed between us. The full tragedy of the War begins to unfold itself when a specific individual is concerned. Multiply that tragedy by millions, and add to it a thousand circumstances of pathos & misery, and you may see what War on such a scale as this really means. How cruel it is, how inexorable, how indiscrimating, how immeasurably wanton.

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